Sylvie Gravel, caregiver to her spouse and member of the GASO

For Sylvie Gravel, it was her partner's diagnosis of throat cancer – now 22 years ago – that propelled her into the world of caregiving. At that time, her children were 5 and 7 years old, and her career as a university researcher in occupational health and safety was in full swing. Life was bustling, with significant responsibilities added to her daily caregiving routine. Today, despite periods of remission, her partner lives with significant physiological aftereffects that require him to be fed via a stomach feeding tube and deal with the loss of his swallowing reflexes.

Caregiving thus drastically and wholly integrated into Sylvie's life, as she took on this role while juggling her responsibilities related to family life. Initially, she hesitated to share her situation to prevent her children from being burdened by comments regarding their father's illness. Although this choice came with good intentions, Sylvie realized it could lead to misunderstandings and equally inopportune judgments. Thus, she slowly accepted to reveal more about her situation and share her challenges, which allowed her to experience moments of strong solidarity and learn to accept all the support offered to her, even if it didn't necessarily come from the people she would have imagined.

Throughout her caregiving journey, Sylvie noticed how all the attention is focused on the ill person, leaving the caregiver worn out and without support. That's why the presence of her parents, in-laws, colleagues, and certain acquaintances ready to offer support "here and now, when an emergency arises," helped her through the more difficult times. She also mentions that the services from the Groupe des Aidants du Sud-Ouest provided her with psychosocial support and beneficial spaces for exchange among fellow caregivers.

Sylvie is an energetic woman with an overflowing curiosity who loves discovery and travel. These 22 years spent accompanying and supporting her partner in illness have provided her with vast caregiving expertise but also reveal that caregiving is a long journey of learning. Today, as her partner's medical conditions become increasingly complex, she works on recognizing and accepting her limits as a caregiver and life partner.

To caregivers, Sylvie wishes to remind them "to take it one day at a time... and sometimes, one hour at a time!" because life is full of uncertainties. It is better then to set realistic daily expectations than to pride oneself on hope or fall into despair.